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Chapter 8
1. Fairytales such as Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty provide a romantic (if not realistic)
depiction of ___________ relationships.
a. social
b. intimate
c. real
d. familial
Answer: b
Fairytales like Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty often focus on the romantic aspect of
relationships, portraying deep emotional connections and closeness between characters,
which aligns with the concept of intimate relationships.
2. With which of the following groups do we have the most intimate relationships?
a. Close friends
b. Co-workers
c. Acquaintances
d. Romantic partners
Answer: d
Intimacy is most commonly associated with romantic partners as it involves a deep emotional
connection, trust, and vulnerability, which are typically found in romantic relationships.
3. Which of the following terms refers to the significant emotional closeness that you
experience in a relationship, romantic or not?
a. Closeness
b. Commitment
c. Intimacy

d. Interdependence
Answer: c
Intimacy refers to the emotional closeness and bond shared between individuals in a
relationship, whether it's romantic or not. It involves feelings of trust, vulnerability, and deep
4. Ryan O’Neal and Farrah Fawcett had an almost 30-year relationship that, despite its ups
and downs, did not end until her death in 2009. O’Neal was by Fawcett’s side through her
long battle with cancer and was with her when she died. Despite their many difficulties, this
couple had a deep level of ___________ toward one another.
a. intimacy
b. interdependence
c. closeness
d. commitment
Answer: d
The description highlights the enduring nature of their relationship and O'Neal's unwavering
support for Fawcett, indicating a strong commitment despite challenges.
5. Which of the following is NOT a form of commitment?
a. Psychic
b. Emotional
c. Social
d. Legal
Answer: a

Psychic commitment is not a recognized form of commitment in relationships. Instead,
emotional, social, and legal commitments are commonly acknowledged.
6. When you listen to your sister’s problems, even when they seem trivial to you, you are
exhibiting what kind of commitment to her?
a. Personal
b. Social
c. Emotional
d. Legal
Answer: c
Listening to your sister's problems, even when they seem trivial, demonstrates emotional
commitment, as it involves offering support, empathy, and understanding in the relationship.
7. Caroline does not enjoy spending time with her husband’s family at all. She finds them to
be overbearing and pretentious, and she’s sure her mother-in-law does not like her. However,
because of her __________ commitment to her husband, Caroline spends holidays and some
vacations with her in-laws.
a. legal
b. financial
c. emotional
d. social
Answer: d
Caroline's willingness to spend time with her husband's family despite her personal feelings
indicates a social commitment to her husband, as she prioritizes maintaining familial
harmony and supporting her husband's relationships.

8. Which of the following describes engaging in specific behaviors aimed at increasing
intimacy with the target of a person’s affection, including spying, sending the target
unwelcome expressions of attraction or love, and engaging in sexually harassing behaviors?
a. Relationship compulsion
b. Obsessive relational intrusion
c. Stalking
d. Obsessive compulsive disorder
Answer: b
Obsessive relational intrusion involves intrusive behaviors intended to establish or maintain a
relationship, often disregarding the other person's boundaries and consent.
9. Which term describes the dynamic, common in families and close relationships, in which
one person’s actions influence the lives of others?
a. Commitment
b. Investment
c. Interdependence
d. Intimacy
Answer: c
Interdependence refers to the mutual reliance and influence between individuals in
relationships, where one person's actions or decisions can significantly impact others within
the relationship.
10. If your best friend gets a job in another city, you would most likely not sell your home
and follow him or her. However, if your spouse or partner got a job in another city, you would
seriously consider the possibility of moving. Your different reactions to the same situation,
but in relation to different people, corresponds to which of the following?
a. Investment

b. Interdependence
c. Intimacy
d. Commitment
Answer: b
Your willingness to consider moving for your spouse or partner but not for your best friend
demonstrates the level of interdependence in your romantic relationship compared to your
friendship. Interdependence involves a higher degree of reliance and mutual influence
typically found in close romantic relationships.
11. Intimate relationships usually involve a higher commitment of our energies and other
resources, called
a. investment.
b. interdependence.
c. dialects.
d. costs.
Answer: a
Investment refers to the commitment of resources such as time, energy, and emotions into a
relationship, which is a characteristic feature of intimate relationships.
12. If you think you are putting more into your relationship than your partner is, it’s easy to
feel resentful that there isn’t an equal level of
a. interdependence.
b. dialect.
c. investment.
d. intimacy.
Answer: c

Feeling like you're investing more in the relationship than your partner can lead to
resentment, indicating a lack of balance in the investment of resources.
13. Which term describes conflicts between two important but opposing needs or desires in
a. Fights
b. Dialectical tensions
c. Conflicts of interest
d. Tensions
Answer: b
Dialectical tensions refer to the conflicts arising from opposing needs or desires in a
relationship, such as autonomy versus connection or openness versus closedness.
14. Which of the following is NOT a common dialectical tension in intimate relationships?
a. Autonomy versus connection
b. Openness versus closedness
c. Predictability versus novelty
d. Commitment versus insecurity
Answer: d
Dialectical tensions typically involve conflicts between opposing needs or desires.
"Commitment versus insecurity" does not represent a commonly acknowledged dialectical
tension in intimate relationships.
15. James was always close to his mother, but as he enters adolescence, he wants to spend
less and less time with her. He finds her to be overbearing and overprotective. However, at
times he finds himself craving the security of the relationship he used to have with his mother

and wants to connect again emotionally with her. James is experiencing which dialectical
a. Commitment versus insecurity
b. Openness versus closedness
c. Autonomy versus connection
d. Predictability versus novelty
Answer: c
James is torn between his desire for independence (autonomy) and his need for emotional
closeness and connection with his mother.
16. Self-disclosure is most closely connected to which dialectical tension?
a. Predictability versus novelty
b. Commitment versus insecurity
c. Openness versus closedness
d. Autonomy versus connection
Answer: c
Self-disclosure involves revealing personal information to another person, which relates
closely to the dialectical tension of openness versus closedness.
17. Partners who have been together for ten years should not only appreciate the orderliness
and certainty that comes from knowing someone for so long, but should also make sure to
incorporate new activities to provide change and newness. By balancing these two needs, a
couple can successfully navigate which dialectical tension?
a. Commitment versus insecurity
b. Openness versus closedness
c. Autonomy versus connection

d. Predictability versus novelty
Answer: d
The tension between predictability (routine, stability) and novelty (new experiences, change)
is illustrated in long-term relationships, where maintaining both familiarity and excitement is
18. Which of the following statements is NOT true about marriages and long-term romantic
a. Being married raises a person’s likelihood of engaging in risky behaviors.
b. Married people live longer and healthier lives than do those who never marry.
c. Married people are less likely to suffer from psychological disorders, such as depression,
than are never-married people.
d. Single people are more likely than married people to use an illicit drug such as marijuana.
Answer: a
Contrary to the statement, being married typically decreases the likelihood of engaging in
risky behaviors, as marriage often provides stability and social support.
19. Which of the following terms can be defined as participation in only one romantic
relationship at a time and avoidance of romantic or sexual involvement with others outside of
that relationship?
a. Infidelity
b. Monogamy
c. Loyalty
d. Commitment
Answer: b

Monogamy refers to the practice of having only one romantic or sexual partner at a time,
excluding involvement with others outside of that relationship.
20. Lucas and Chloe have been together for two years. They are fully committed to one
another and their relationship. However, they have chosen to have an “open” relationship,
wherein romantic and/or sexual involvement with others outside the relationship is accepted.
Although their family and friends don’t understand the relationship, Lucas and Chloe feel that
what they have is strong. This relationship illustrates the idea that some romantic
a. are voluntary, and some are not.
b. are based on love, and some are not.
c. are exclusive, and some are not.
d. involve same-sex partners, and some do not.
Answer: c
Lucas and Chloe's relationship challenges the notion that all romantic relationships are
exclusive, demonstrating that some relationships allow for involvement with others outside of
the primary partnership.
21. If a couple stays together “for the kids,” it is because some romantic relationships
a. involve same-sex partners, and some do not.
b. are based on love, and some are not.
c. are voluntary, and some are not.
d. are exclusive, and some are not.
Answer: c
Staying together "for the kids" implies a lack of voluntary choice in the relationship,
suggesting that not all romantic relationships are entered into willingly.

22. Many people in same-sex relationships live as ________, often jointly owning property
and raising children together, and even questioning whether they should be allowed to legally
a. lovers
b. cohabitators
c. couples
d. domestic partners
Answer: d
"Domestic partners" is the most suitable term to describe individuals in same-sex
relationships who share property, raise children together, and advocate for legal recognition
of their unions.
23. Some people in _____________ relationships report they appreciate the closeness and
intimacy they share with multiple partners, whereas others indicate feelings of jealousy and
resentment that lead to increased conflict.
a. polygamous
b. multiple
c. monogamous
d. committed
Answer: a
"Polygamous" relationships involve multiple partners, and individuals within such
relationships may experience varying levels of satisfaction or conflict due to the dynamics
24. In some cultures, the practice of arranged marriages is common and accepted because of
the effect that culture has on expectations for which of the following?
a. exclusivity

b. voluntariness
c. sexuality
d. love
Answer: b
Arranged marriages are often accepted due to cultural expectations regarding voluntariness,
where individuals may not have the same degree of choice in selecting their partners as in
cultures where love marriages are prevalent.
25. Your text discussed how culture affects all of the following expectations for intimate
relationships EXCEPT which?
a. Sexuality
b. Love
c. Exclusivity
d. Commitment
Answer: d
Culture influences expectations regarding sexuality, love, and exclusivity in intimate
relationships, but commitment is a fundamental aspect that transcends cultural variations and
is universally valued.
26. Chaman is introduced to Hakesh by her family. They are both originally from India, and
both are still very involved and immersed in their culture, even though they now live in
Washington, D.C. Chaman likes Hakesh, and when he asks her to marry him, she agrees,
even though she doesn’t feel she is in love with him. She knows that it is a good match and
that it will please her family; since she gets along with him, Chaman thinks it will be a good
marriage. This is because culture affects expectations for
a. love.
b. exclusivity.

c. voluntariness.
d. sexuality.
Answer: a
Chaman's decision to marry Hakesh despite not being in love with him is influenced by
cultural expectations regarding love, where factors like family approval and compatibility are
considered more important than romantic love.
27. Same-sex partners can marry with full legal recognition in 10 countries, and many other
countries recognize civil unions or domestic partnerships. These countries can be contrasted
with those that prohibit people of the same sex from being romantically or sexually involved
at all. There are even countries that impose the death penalty for those who violate such laws.
What accounts for these extreme differences between countries?
a. Culture affects expectations for love.
b. Culture affects expectations for exclusivity.
c. Culture affects expectations for sexuality.
d. Culture affects expectations for voluntariness.
Answer: c
Extreme differences in legal recognition and societal attitudes toward same-sex relationships
stem from cultural norms and expectations regarding sexuality, which can vary widely
between countries.
28. During the _________ stage of relationship development, you might ask such questions
as “What movies do you like?” and “How many brothers and sisters do you have?” to gain
more information about a potential partner.
a. initiating
b. integrating
c. experimenting

d. bonding
Answer: c
The "experimenting" stage involves gathering information and exploring common interests to
assess compatibility and potential for a deeper relationship.
29. Alex and Madison have been on a few dates and really like each other. They decide to
have a picnic in the park with all of their friends so they can meet each other’s social circles.
After the picnic, they sit on the beach and talk about their fears and secrets about the past. At
the end of the date, Alex tells Madison “You are really special to me.” Alex and Madison are
in the _________ stage of relationship development.
a. bonding
b. intensifying
c. integrating
d. experimenting
Answer: b
The "intensifying" stage involves deepening emotional connection and sharing personal
thoughts and feelings, as seen in Alex and Madison's discussion about fears and secrets.
30. The ____________ stage of relationship development occurs when a deep commitment
has formed and the partners share a strong sense that the relationship has its own identity.
a. integrating
b. intensifying
c. bonding
d. initiating
Answer: a

The "integrating" stage signifies a high level of commitment and the development of a shared
identity within the relationship.
31. Beyond serving as a public expression of a couple’s commitment, which stage of
relationship development also allows individuals to gain support and approval of people in
their social networks?
a. Intensifying
b. Integrating
c. Experimenting
d. Bonding
Answer: d
The bonding stage of relationship development involves making a public commitment, such
as marriage, and gaining support and approval from social networks. This stage solidifies the
relationship and integrates it into the broader social context.
32. “Winking” at someone on an online dating service would be an example of which of the
a. Experimenting
b. Intensifying
c. Initiating
d. Bonding
Answer: c
"Winking" at someone on an online dating service is an initial action indicating interest, thus
it corresponds to the initiating stage where communication and initial contact occur.
33. Which of the following statements is the most accurate about relationship formation?
a. The stages of relational development are exclusive to opposite-sex romantic couples.

b. Relationships develop quite differently online than they do in real life.
c. Relationship formation is not identical in all cultures.
d. Most couples go through the stages of relationship development in the same way.
Answer: c
Relationship formation varies across cultures due to cultural norms, values, and social
structures, making option c the most accurate statement.
34. Which of the following terms describes an expressed struggle between at least two
interdependent parties who perceive incompatible goals, scarce resources, and interference
from the other party in achieving their goals?
a. Arguing
b. Conflict
c. Disagreeing
d. Differentiating
Answer: b
Conflict involves a perceived struggle between parties due to incompatible goals, scarce
resources, or interference, which distinguishes it from mere arguing or disagreement.
35. Saria and Emily have been together for several years and are raising two children
together. Lately, their relationship has had some conflict because they disagree about where
to send their children to school. Saria wants an exclusive private school, but Emily is
concerned about the cost. She just doesn’t think they can afford Saria’s plan, so she wants
them to go to public school. Saria thinks that if they would just give up vacations and dinners
out, they could afford the private school. What is this conflict about?
a. Scarce resources
b. Interference from another party
c. Incompatible goals

d. Unrealistic expectations
Answer: a
The conflict arises from scarce resources, namely the financial constraint of affording a
private school, which is the primary point of contention between Saria and Emily.
36. It is often the way couples handle _______________, rather than how much of it they
experience, that influences the success of their relationships.
a. commitment
b. intimacy
c. problems
d. conflict
Answer: d
The effectiveness of handling conflicts influences relationship success more than the
frequency of conflicts, emphasizing the importance of conflict management skills.
37. Which word best describes romantic partners who talk about their disagreements openly
and cooperatively?
a. Volatile
b. Hostile
c. Validating
d. Conflict-avoiding
Answer: c
Partners who discuss disagreements openly and cooperatively are validating each other's
perspectives, leading to a constructive approach to conflict resolution.

38. During conflicts that arise in their relationship, Gavin and Mia tend to be very negative
and quick to express anger and disappointment. They have a hard time listening to one
another and instead spend arguments trying to persuade the other person to agree with them.
Although their arguments are heated, they are often followed by intense periods of affection
and “making up.” Which word best describes Gavin and Mia as a couple?
a. Volatile
b. Hostile
c. Conflict-avoiding
d. Validating
Answer: a
Gavin and Mia exhibit volatility in their relationship, characterized by intense emotional
exchanges during conflicts followed by periods of reconciliation.
39. Leah and Matt find out they are expecting a baby. Matt wants to tell their family and
friends right away, but Leah wants to wait three months before sharing the information, as
that is when the risk of miscarriage is highest. According to __________________ theory,
Leah and Matt jointly own the information about Leah’s pregnancy and must both decide
when and how to share it.
a. privacy
b. self-disclosure
c. communication privacy management
d. self-disclosure agreement
Answer: c
Communication privacy management theory explains how individuals jointly manage and
disclose private information, such as Leah and Matt deciding when to share news about the

40. In keeping with the idea that romantic relationships vary in how they handle
_____________, studies show that people in satisfying marriages maintain a ratio of
approximately five positive behaviors for every one negative behavior. This can be contrasted
with unhappy couples, who are more likely to reciprocate expressions of negative emotion.
a. privacy
b. emotional communication
c. conflict
d. instrumental communication
Answer: b
Emotional communication refers to how couples express and handle emotions within their
relationship, with the ratio of positive to negative emotional exchanges being a key indicator
of relationship satisfaction.
41. What is the most common form of communication in a relationship?
a. Emotional
b. Factual
c. Conflict
d. Instrumental
Answer: d
Instrumental communication refers to practical, day-to-day communication focused on tasks
and goals, such as discussing household chores or making plans. In many relationships,
especially long-term ones, instrumental communication tends to be the most common form as
partners navigate shared responsibilities and activities.
42. ___________ communication can be one of the most contentious issues couples face, as
romantic partners often disagree over the division of responsibilities for daily tasks.
a. Physical

b. Instrumental
c. Emotional
d. Factual
Answer: b
Instrumental communication involves discussing and negotiating tasks and responsibilities in
a relationship. Disagreements over who should do what chores or tasks often lead to
contention, making instrumental communication a contentious issue for many couples.
43. If Jamie begins to view his girlfriend’s differences as annoying, he is most likely in the
________ stage of relationship deterioration.
a. differentiating
b. avoiding
c. circumscribing
d. stagnating
Answer: a
The differentiating stage of relationship deterioration involves partners focusing on their
differences rather than their similarities. Jamie's perception of his girlfriend's differences as
annoying indicates a shift towards differentiation.
44. When romantic partners enter the ___________ stage of relationship deterioration, they
begin to decrease the quality and quantity of their communication with each other.
a. differentiating
b. stagnating
c. circumscribing
d. avoiding
Answer: c

The circumscribing stage is characterized by decreasing communication quality and quantity.
Partners may start avoiding certain topics or withdrawing emotionally, leading to a decline in
the overall communication within the relationship.
45. After many years, it is not uncommon for relationships to come into which stage, when
partners feel as if they are “going through the motions” and the relationship stops growing?
a. Stagnating
b. Differentiating
c. Circumscribing
d. Avoiding
Answer: a
The stagnating stage is marked by a sense of inertia and lack of growth in the relationship.
Partners may feel as though they are merely going through the motions without experiencing
any significant development or positive change.
46. Ben and Sasha have not been happy in their relationship for a few months. Sasha finds
herself making excuses when Ben goes to kiss or hug her, claiming a migraine or illness. Ben
finds reasons not to be home at night; he likes to work late or go out with his friends. Ben and
Sasha are most likely in which stage of relationship deterioration?
a. Circumscribing
b. Terminating
c. Stagnating
d. Avoiding
Answer: d

Ben and Sasha's avoidance of physical intimacy and spending time together suggests they are
in the avoiding stage of relationship deterioration. They are actively avoiding interactions and
closeness with each other.
47. Our relationships with which of the following groups are distinguished by the depth of
our engagement, as well as the fact that they can be both positive and negative forces in our
a. Families
b. Friends
c. Children
d. Parents
Answer: a
Relationships with family members are typically characterized by deep emotional
engagement and can have both positive and negative impacts on individuals' lives due to the
complexity of familial dynamics.
48. Which of the following is NOT considered an important familial characteristic?
a. Legal obligations
b. Role behaviors
c. Proximity behaviors
d. Genetic ties
Answer: c
Proximity behaviors, such as physical closeness or living arrangements, are not typically
considered fundamental familial characteristics. Legal obligations, role behaviors, and
genetic ties are more commonly associated with defining familial relationships.
49. Ruby’s father has never been around. He left her mother shortly after Ruby’s birth, and
only calls to check in on Ruby once or twice a year. He has never sent a birthday card or

come to see Ruby in a school show. When Ruby is asked about her father, she simply tells
people she doesn’t have one. This is because Ruby probably believes that although sharing a
__________ makes two people biological relatives, it does not necessarily make them family.
a. legal obligation
b. genetic tie
c. family
d. last name
Answer: b
Genetic tie refers to the biological relationship between individuals. Ruby recognizes the
genetic tie she shares with her father but does not consider him as part of her family due to
his absence and lack of involvement in her life.
50. In the film Precious, the title character is physically, sexually, and mentally abused by her
mother. In addition to throwing pans at Precious and calling her names, Precious’s mother
either starves her or forces her to overeat and berates her for going to school. It is clear early
in the film that Precious’s mother has failed in her _______________ toward her, neglecting
her responsibilities to house, feed, educate, and care for her child.
a. legal obligations
b. genetic ties
c. role behaviors
d. psychological responsibilities
Answer: a
Legal obligations pertain to the responsibilities parents have to provide for their children's
basic needs, including housing, food, education, and care. Precious's mother's failure to fulfill
these basic responsibilities demonstrates a neglect of her legal obligations towards her

51. ________ behaviors may include a family living together, taking care of each other,
loving each other, and representing themselves as a family to outsiders.
a. Familial
b. Relational
c. Social
d. Role
Answer: d
In this context, the behaviors described, such as living together, taking care of each other, and
representing themselves as a family to outsiders, indicate the roles individuals play within the
family structure. Roles define the expected behaviors and responsibilities of individuals
within a family unit.
52. Your family of ___________ is the family you grew up in, typically consisting of your
parents or stepparents and any siblings you have.
a. genetics
b. origin
c. procreation
d. derivation
Answer: b
"Family of origin" refers to the family into which a person is born or adopted and raised. This
term specifically emphasizes the familial context in which an individual grows up,
encompassing parents, stepparents, and siblings.
53. One family type that is becoming increasingly common is the ________ family, with two
adult partners raising children who are not the biological offspring of both partners.
a. nuclear
b. origin

c. blended
d. single-parent
Answer: c
A "blended family" refers to a family unit where two adults are in a relationship and are
raising children who may not be the biological offspring of both partners. This typically
occurs due to remarriage or forming a new partnership after a previous relationship.
54. Positions in a family, such as father and son, are based on the structure of your
relationships with others, but _________ are based on the social and emotional functions that
your behaviors serve within your family.
a. norms
b. rituals
c. roles
d. parts
Answer: c
While positions in a family (like father, son, etc.) are based on structural relationships, roles
are based on the social and emotional functions that individuals fulfill within the family unit.
Roles dictate the expected behaviors, responsibilities, and interactions of each family
55. The Jones family is having conflict over where to go for vacation next summer. Mac, the
father, is annoyed, blaming his wife Jen for the conflict, because she insisted the decision be
based on a vote. Jen is placating everyone, trying to keep them calm. Meanwhile, their son
Jett is trying to use logic and reason to persuade everyone to agree to his point of view. His
twin Jade is uncomfortable with the entire decision, so she is trying to distract everyone with
jokes and offhand comments. This is how most conflicts go in the Jones household, because
the Jones family members typically fall into these _________ during conflict episodes.
a. roles

b. rituals
c. stories
d. secrets
Answer: a
In this scenario, each family member exhibits a distinct role during conflict episodes: Mac
blames, Jen placates, Jett tries to reason, and Jade distracts. These roles represent the patterns
of behavior individuals adopt during conflicts, which are characteristic of their roles within
the family dynamic.
56. Spending every Halloween scaring trick-or-treaters who come to the door would be an
example of a family
a. story.
b. secret.
c. habit.
d. ritual.
Answer: d
The described behavior of scaring trick-or-treaters on Halloween represents a repeated and
customary action within the family, indicative of a ritual. Rituals are repeated behaviors that
hold symbolic significance within a family or cultural context, often serving to reinforce
family bonds or traditions.
57. Jamila loves how every time she brings a new friend by her grandparents’ house, her
grandfather insists on showing pictures of Jamila as a young ballerina. He will tell humorous
details about how she couldn’t keep time and could never remember the steps. Despite its
numerous re-tellings, this family _________ still makes Jamila and her grandfather laugh as
they share their history.
a. secret

b. role
c. story
d. ritual
Answer: c
The recounting of humorous details about Jamila's past as a young ballerina, accompanied by
showing pictures, constitutes a shared narrative or "family story." Such stories contribute to
the family's shared history and identity, often eliciting shared laughter and reinforcing
familial bonds.
58. Family _________ often contain information the family considers private and not
appropriate for sharing with outsiders.
a. roles
b. secrets
c. rituals
d. stories
Answer: b
Family secrets are pieces of information or knowledge that are kept within the family unit
and are not shared with outsiders. These secrets are typically considered private and may
involve sensitive or personal matters that the family wishes to keep confidential.
59. Which of the following is considered a confirming message?
a. Control
b. Strategy
c. Spontaneity
d. Certainty
Answer: c

A confirming message, as opposed to a disconfirming message, is one that validates or
affirms the worth and dignity of the other person. Spontaneity, in this context, reflects a
genuine and unscripted interaction that acknowledges and respects the other person's feelings
or opinions.
60. Your brother asks what you think of his term paper. You don’t think it is very good, but
you decide to go with a more confirming response, saying, “I’m not sure, but then again I
never was very good in English.” By using a ______________ message, you convey your
point of view while inviting alternative views so as not to hurt your brother’s feelings.
a. provisional
b. descriptive
c. empathy
d. equality
Answer: a
By providing a provisional response that acknowledges your own limitations in English while
refraining from directly criticizing your brother's term paper, you convey your point of view
tactfully. A provisional message allows for the expression of personal opinions while
maintaining openness to alternative perspectives, preserving the relationship and avoiding
hurt feelings.
61. If your friend is telling you about a particularly emotional issue she is having and your
response is simply, “It’ll be fine,” your message is
a. appropriate.
b. confirming.
c. empathic.
d. disconfirming.
Answer: d

The response "It'll be fine" dismisses the friend's emotions without addressing or
acknowledging them, which can be disconfirming and invalidating.
62. Lily likes her classmate Beth, but finds her to be disingenuous at times. After class, Beth
will ask, “What are you doing right now?” If Lily says nothing or that she is going home,
Beth will then ask for a ride home. Lily wishes that Beth would use the ______________
message of spontaneity and just ask directly for a ride home instead of “trapping” Lily into it.
a. confirming
b. disconfirming
c. honest
d. positive
Answer: a
Lily desires Beth to directly communicate her need for a ride instead of engaging in indirect
communication or manipulation, which would be more confirming and honest.
63. Which of the following is NOT one of John Gottman’s “Four Horsemen of the
a. Contempt
b. Stonewalling
c. Criticism
d. Disapproval
Answer: d
John Gottman's "Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse" are contempt, stonewalling, criticism,
and defensiveness, but "Disapproval" is not among them.
64. One of the first warning signs of distress in a relationship is when partners engage in
_________, or complaints about each other.

a. contempt
b. stonewalling
c. criticism
d. defensiveness
Answer: c
Criticism, or complaints about each other, is a warning sign of distress in a relationship as it
reflects dissatisfaction and negative perceptions.
65. Natalie and Xavier have been having difficulties in their relationship for a long time.
They’ve stopped being kind to one another and do not treat each other respectfully. In one
particular argument, Xavier accuses Natalie of spending too much time with her friends, but
she fires back that it is because he ignores her when they are home. He says he ignores her
because she is always nagging him. Natalie and Xavier’s portrayal of themselves as victims,
and their denial of responsibility for their own behavior, are examples of which of the
a. Contempt
b. Defensiveness
c. Criticism
d. Stonewalling
Answer: b
Natalie and Xavier are deflecting responsibility for their actions and portraying themselves as
victims, which is characteristic of defensiveness in communication.
66. People who engage in _______________ stop looking at their partners, stop speaking,
and stop responding to what their partners are saying.
a. defensiveness
b. contempt

c. criticism
d. stonewalling
Answer: d
Stonewalling involves withdrawing from communication by ceasing to look at, speak to, or
respond to one's partner, often as a way of avoiding conflict or shutting down emotionally.
67. After Tyrese and Ryan move in together, Ryan finds himself disappointed. He thought
they’d spend all their time together, but Tyrese still spends time with his other friends. Ryan
also discovers Tyrese is messy, even though Ryan expected him to be immaculate. To avoid
this type of disappointment, Ryan could have used what strategy?
a. Have realistic expectations.
b. Emphasize excitement and positivity.
c. Handle conflict constructively.
d. Manage dialectical tensions.
Answer: a
Having realistic expectations involves acknowledging and accepting the reality of the
situation, which could have helped Ryan avoid disappointment in this case.
68. Which of the following is NOT a strategy for managing dialectical tensions?
a. Segmentation
b. Alternation
c. Orientation
d. Recalibration
Answer: c

Segmentation, alternation, and recalibration are strategies for managing dialectical tensions,
but "Orientation" is not recognized as one.
69. Abby is feeling frustrated with her boyfriend, Noah. He likes to play online games, and
she feels he spends too much time playing and not enough time with her. Noah loves playing
online and doesn’t want to give it up, but he also loves Abby and wants her to be happy. They
finally agree to compromise: Abby brings over her homework and sits with Noah while he
plays. They can talk about what is happening and spend time together, while both get
something accomplished. Abby and Noah have incorporated what strategy to manage a
dialectical tension?
a. Segmentation
b. Integration
c. Reaffirmation
d. Alternation
Answer: b
Integration involves finding a compromise that satisfies both partners' needs, as Abby and
Noah did by combining their activities to spend time together.
70. If you decide to embrace the fact that your relationship will “settle” and become more
predictable, and you make peace with having less novelty in the relationship, you have used
___________ as a method of dealing with dialectical tension.
a. Reaffirmation
b. Segmentation
c. Alternation
d. Balance
Answer: a

Reaffirmation involves accepting and reaffirming certain aspects of the relationship while
acknowledging and managing conflicting desires or tensions, such as the desire for novelty
versus stability.

Test Bank for Communication Matters
Kory Floyd
9780078036866, 9781259707766

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